
DIVISION 51
NEWSLETTER, Summer 2001
| Presidential
Message | Book Review | Editorial
|
| 2001 Convention Program for Division
51 |
| Convention CE Workshop |
| Psychology's Role in Building Health World |
| Midwinter Update | Conference
on Men and Masculinity |
| Committee on Women Nominations | Gender
goes to the Movies |
| Social Activism | Men's
Health |
| Psychology of Men and Masculinity | Nominations
for Fellows |
| Special Focus Section: The Essential Father |
Bulletin Ad Rates |
| Listserv | Mission Statement
| Div. 51 Central Office |
| Membership Application | Policy
on Book Reviews |
| Cookbook | Web Site | Governance
|
SPSMM Bulletin
Deadlines: January 31, April 30, July 31, October 31
PRESIDENTIAL
MESSAGE 
The
War for Boys: Youth in Crisis
James
F. Dean, PhD
Christina
Hoff Sommers wrote an article titled, "The War Against Boys"
in the May 2000 issue of the Atlantic Monthly. Ms. Sommers argued
that boys fare on the whole much worse than girls during their school
careers. This article argued that schools have been unduly focused
on helping girls adjust to becoming successful in a male dominated
world while forgetting to meet the needs of boys. Ms. Sommers goes
on about how boys much more than girls are in need of help. While
this article is a thinly veiled attack on feminist thinkers and writers,
Ms. Sommers has maybe done all of us a favor by underscoring the need
for increasing attention on boys. As Bill Pollack wrote in his introduction
to Real Boys' Voices, our boys are not receiving the attention they
need and deserve. It has been a little over two years since the tragedy
at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado. Columbine has become
the clarion call to force our society to realize that all is not well
with boys.
Dan
Kindlon and Michael Thompson cite statistics in the first chapter
of their book, Raising Cain, attesting to the need for identifying
interventions to help boys. Boys cause 95% of juvenile homicides.
Suicide is the third leading cause of death for male teenagers. Boys
as compared to girls are three to four more times likely to be diagnosed
with learning or attention disorders. Everyone is in agreement that
more needs to be done to help boys in crisis. Books such as Real Voices
and Raising Cain have led the way in identifying the need to respond
to boys in a way that allows for boys to free themselves from traditional
cultural training that requires boys to always be tough, competitive,
and to never show weakness. Pollack has coined the term the Boy Code
to refer to the gender straight jacket that makes it difficult for
boys to display any characteristics such as sensitivity for fear of
being seen as not masculine.
Drawing
from writers such as Pollack, Kindlon and Thompson as well as others,
we can begin to get an idea of just what boys need and steps that
can be taken to help boys. Boys need to be taught how to be emotionally
literate. Adults need to not only allow boys the opportunity to talk
about feelings, but need to encourage males to reflect on how to respond
empathetically to a situation. There is some controversy as to how
much of a biological imperative leads boys to naturally be more action
oriented and less reflective as compared to girls. But despite any
biological influences, it is clear that boys have feelings and that
society often gives boys the message that it is not OK to express
those feelings. Socialized to always be number one, never to cry,
to not give an inch has led to many deleterious effects for boys and
men. Men end up not only cut off from their emotions, but also from
their humanity.
Columbine
has led to a new emphasis on teasing and bullying (apparently the
two teenagers responsible for the killing had been teased). New studies
suggest that thirty per cent of the kids in schools today are either
being bullied or are bullies themselves. Despite a recent article
in the May 20th New York Times suggesting that bullying is a natural
consequence of growing up, many schools are starting to address teasing
in their schools which should lead to a decrease in child cruelty.
Howard Spivak and Deborah Prothrow-Stith have co-authored a book titled
Deadly Consequences and these authors report that European schools
have been successful in reducing bullying by fifty per cent. Andy
Horne and Mark Kiselica have been pioneers in publishing work for
years looking at the phenomenon of bullying.
Not
too surprising is the obvious fact that our boys need to be provided
loving parenting from adults. Adults need to communicate to boys that
they will be accepted and loved regardless of whether they win or
lose a game. Good old unconditional positive regard could go a long
way in building a sense of self-worth for male youth. Boys need to
have an adult who makes it clear that it is important to express feelings
and is able to model for their children relational connectedness.
There is some controversy as to the necessity of boys having male
role models. Writers argue that it is especially important for boys
to be in the company of men. There is also a body of research tying
male violence to father absence. However, family therapist Olga Silverstein
has demonstrated in her work that mothers raising their sons without
fathers can be successful in teaching their boys to acknowledge their
feelings and grow up to be successful young men. If fathers are available,
they need to involve themselves with their boys in intimate ways.
Fathers have the opportunity to present their sons with male role
models that allow for the broadest possible definition of masculinity.
Don't
forget to hear Bill Pollack who will present an Invited APA Presidential
address Friday night at the convention this year titled " Real
Boys, Real Girls, Real Parents: Preventing Violence through Family
Connection". Also, Bill Pollack, Ron Levant, and Jim Garbarino
will present at a symposium Saturday titled, "The War for Boys:
What Must We Do To Win?" You can access the entire Division 51
program on the Division 51 Website.
Robert Rando has
done an excellent job as the D51 Web Master. And John Robertson has
put together an excellent program for our division at the convention.
As always you can reach me at 718-768-0422 or deannyc@jps.net.
Thanks to Vicki Putz who wrote me to point out the potentially harmful
metaphor "war for boys" as continuing the very behaviors
we all want to eliminate. As actors Ruby Dee and Ossie Davis said
at the Screen Actors Awards presentation recently, " Lift the
guns from our children's backpacks and fill them with dreams".
BOOK REVIEW
Dr. Richard B. Gartner's Betrayed as Boys: Psychodynamic
Treatment of Sexually Abused Men
Review
by
Dr. Mic Hunter
Psychoanalysis
and the topic of sexual abuse have a conflicted history. Ever since
Freud recanted his statement, "at the bottom of every case of
hysteria there are one or more occurrences of premature sexual experiences"
(The Aetiology of Hysteria, 1896) and replaced it with the Seduction
Theory those with psychodynamic training have viewed their patients'
stories of childhood sexual experiences as fantasy or wish fulfillment.
Therefore some may think of a book titled Betrayed As Boys: Psychodynamic
Treatment of Sexually Abuse Men as a contradiction in terms. So too
it was with the author. In the introduction Gartner acknowledges that
his training made it most improbable that he would be able to accurately
identify and effectively treat males who had been sexually abused
as children. It was not until he had been in practice for over fifteen
years that he began to question the conventional psychodynamic view.
As for so many of us, Gartner's awakening came, not from a professional
journal or conference, but in the form of a patient. Gartner describes
it, "As he slowly began to recall horrifying stories of sexual
abuse in early childhood, I was forced to rethink how to understand
them. If they were entirely fantasies, then Patrick was floridly psychotic,
which I did not believe. But if his stories were even partly true,
then he had been the victim of grievous crimes perpetrated by his
father and brother" (p.1). Thus began Gartner's complete rethinking
of the issue of childhood sexual abuse which lead to the writing of
this book.
Gartner
is a scholar and begins his book with a review of the literature.
Those who have been studying this topic in the last twenty years will
find nothing new here. Similar reviews can be found in any number
of recent books. The literature on the topic of male sexual victimization
has exploded in the last two decades. To illustrate Gartner's author/year
citations on the topic take three-quarters of a page. Those who are
familiar with the definition, and effects of sexual abuse can skip
over these sections and begin their reading with page 35 with the
section that begins, "Goals, Process, And Themes In Treatment."
Once
Gartner has demonstrated the existence of sexual abuse he spends the
rest of the first five chapters addressing in detail how gender role
and cultural expectations affects the ability of males to identify
themselves as having been victimized. Gartner invites the reader to
rethink the various scenarios which society currently view as sexual
initiation, not sexual abuse. This includes when women are sexual
with boys, and when men has sex with homosexual boys. I applaud his
use of the term "same sex abuse" rather than the misleading
term "homosexual abuse" which tends to reinforce the myth
that men who have sex with boys are homosexual. His chapter titled
"Same-sex" abuse addresses in detail this issue.
The
thirty pages of chapter 3 "Struggles About Masculinity"
do an excellent job of explaining the reasons that sexual abuse treatment
can not be gender neutral. I intend to have the graduate students
in my course "Men in Therapy" read this section of the book
to gain an understanding of the issues faced by men, whether victims
of sexual abuse or not, who enter psychotherapy.
The
impact of gender roles is further examined in chapter 10 (written
with Sue A Shapiro). The authors examine the issues commonly seen
when the client is faced with either a male or female therapist.
The
book ends with a chapter on the use of group therapy. Those who are
already familiar with group therapy will find this a good description
of how group dynamics affect clients who have been sexually abused
and vise versa. Gartner wrote his intention was "to raise, delineate,
and develop the themes that often face the man with such a history
and the clinician working with him" (p. 9). In this reviewer's
opinion he succeeds.

EDITORIAL
Sharing Fellowship
Jim Mahalik,
PhD
This
is the last issue of the Bulletin before the convention and I have been
thinking a lot about the upcoming time in San Francisco. I find myself
getting excited to see people again and share the fellowship that is
so much a part of Division 51.
I
think that "fellowship" sounds odd to people because it seems
to be a word that is out of favor in today's society. However, I use
it deliberately, and some of Webster's definitions for "fellowship"
tell me that it is just the right word to describe what we share as
a division.
Webster
begins by defining fellowship as, "sharing similar interests or
experiences." The interest in boys and men's well being and taking
a critical perspective on masculinity issues draws us together. It also
quickly makes the group an important one to many of us as it is one
of few places where others validate these interests and experiences.
Beyond
the content of what we share is also a sense of mission. In this sense,
Webster defines fellowship as "comradeship." I think I have
found few other places in professional psychology where there is such
a sense of shared urgency to getting out the messages where members
feel a sense of the importance of the mission that the division embraces.
Although
the focus and mission of the division are important to me, I think I
have been most excited in the last couple of days thinking about the
chance to see the people. In this way, Webster's definition of fellowship
as "the companionship of individuals in a congenial atmosphere"
and "a union of friends" captures a lot of what I enjoy most
about the division. Division 51 just has some of the most outstanding
people as members.
I
know this will be a great convention. John Robertson has done an outstanding
job with the program and there is growing interest in APA at large in
the mission of the division. I look forward to our chance to share our
work, our mission, and our friendship together. Please bring a friend.
APA 2001 Convention Workshop:
Violence Prevention in the Early Years
This
workshop is part of the ACT-Adults and Children Together Against Violence
project that the American Psychological Association (APA) developed
in collaboration with the National Association for the Education of
Young Children NAEYC). Aimed at preventing violence in early childhood,
the project focuses on key adults -- parents, teachers, and other caregivers
whose influence helps shape the lives of young children - those under
8 years old.
This
INTERMEDIATE workshop is based on the ACT Against Violence Community
Training program developed by American Psychological Association (APA)
and the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC)
with experts in child development, violence prevention, and training.
The purpose of this workshop is to introduce psychologists to the ACT
Against Violence project, and provide them with an overview of major
topics on early childhood violence prevention, including: a) basic elements
of dissemination of information to diverse groups of adults, b) teaching
skills such as anger management, social problem solving, discipline,
and media literacy and, c) the establishment and maintenance of successful
collaborative efforts among individuals and community organizations.
This workshop is for those who are interested in early childhood and
violence prevention and/or work for organizations or agencies that provide
services for families and/or young children.
This
workshop is designed to help you:
1.
Describe the APA/NAEYC ACT - Adults and Children Together Against
Violence project;
2. Identify strategies for working with diverse group of adults;
3. Disseminate early violence prevention skills -- anger management,
social problem solving; discipline, and media literacy -- to adults
who raise and care for young children; and
4. Identify basic aspects of working with collaborative efforts among
individuals and/or organizations
Faculty:
1.
Diane Bridgeman, PhD, Licenced Practitioner, Capitola Professional Center,
Capitola, CA
2. Caroline Carney, PhD; Chief, Child Development Department, Monterey
Peninsula College, Monterey, CA
Fees:
Member--Advance $175, On-site $210
Nonmember--Advance $205, On-site $240
Enrollment
Limit: 30
CE Credits: 7
Date: Friday, August 24, 2001 - 9:00 am- 5:00 p.m.
APA President Norine G. Johnson,
Ph.D.,
Showcases
Psychology's Role in Building a Healthy World
Join
APA President Norine G. Johnson, PhD and the American Psychological
Association in San Francisco, August 24 through August 28th for the
109th annual APA convention. Highlights of the meeting you won't want
to miss include the Opening Session keynote address by Mary Pipher,
PhD. and the 2001 Presidential Mini Convention, "Psychology Builds
a Healthy World: New Markets, New Research." The Healthy World
mini convention, which takes place in the Moscone Convention Center
from Saturday August 25 through Monday, August 27, features three days
of cutting-edge programs that showcase some of psychology's most distinguished
scientists and practioners.
Each
day of the mini convention will focus on a special theme and feature
a presidential invited speaker in addition to workshops, dialogues and
roundtable discussions. Friday's theme will be Healthy Families and
the invited speaker will be William Pollack, PhD, who will talk about
"Real Boys, Real Girls, Real Parents: Preventing Violence through
Family Connection." On Saturday, the theme will be Healthy Communities
and the invited speaker will be Susan Pick, PhD, whose address will
be "Healthy Sexuality for All: The Role of Psychology." James
Campbell Quick, PhD, will be Monday's invited speaker. His presentation,
"Working Together: Balancing Head and Heart", will kick off
a day of programming on Healthy Workplaces.
This
year, for the first time, APA will offer continuing education credits
for attendance at the mini convention sessions. The CE credits are free
and no pre-registration is required. However, attendance is limited
to 350 people on a first-come, first-serve basis, so plan to arrive
early.
Each
session will include learning objectives, handouts, and information
that attendees can take with them and use such as ideas to build their
practices and ideas for new research challenges. Rather than providing
broad overviews, the speakers will cover new information that addresses
the needs of the general public as well as those of psychologists. Speakers
in each session will show how psychology can help and will identify
the leading research and the most effective applications. They will
also invite audience participation.
The
mini convention program was developed by the APA Task Force on the 2001
Presidential Initiative on Health and its three dedicated co-chairs:
Carol D. Goodheart, EdD, Rodney Hammond, PhD and Ronald H. Rozensky,
PhD. The task force's mission is to identify core health needs of the
public and the policy implications; to use the collective power of all
psychology's constituencies to partner with other relevant organizations;
and to translate psychology's intervention and prevention techniques
back to the public in both visual and written products.
To
learn more about the Psychology Builds a Healthy World mini convention,
the 2001 presidential mini conventions on Expanding Opportunities in
Science and Practice, and other 2001 presidential initiatives, visit
the APA's president's web page www.apa.org/about/president.
For more information about the APA convention, visit www.apa.org/convention.
Updates from the Midwinter
2001 Meeting of
the
APA Council of Representatives
Glenn E. Good,
SPSMM Representative
A
number of interesting issues for SPSMM and psychology arose at the APA
Council of Representatives during the meeting in Washington, D.C. on
February 22-25, 2001. In this report, I seek to provide a summary of
the major issues and decisions, and also a bit of the flavor and tone
of the meetings.
From
APA President Norine Johnson
Norine
(a SPSMM Member) did a superb job of efficiently, gently, and considerately
conducting the complex meetings. She reported on her Presidential Initiatives,
which have the theme Psychology: Building a Healthy World. The
initiatives seek to inform the public and policy-makers about the contributions
of psychology to building healthy families, healthy communities and
healthy workplaces. Her initiatives include increasing awareness of
expanding opportunities in psychological practice and emerging opportunities
in science.
About
the Annual APA Convention
Norine
and the convention staff are planning a very inclusive opening event
for Friday night of the APA Convention in San Francisco. Plan on attending!
There will be numerous venues featuring different types of music and
a cabaret featuring performances by APA members. If you might be interested,
start getting your performance ready!
As
you might have noted, attendance at the annual APA Convention has been
declining of late (only about 6% of APA members attend). Seeking to
address this, a new Convention format will be utilized in the 2002 convention
in Chicago. The convention will be reduced to four days to make a shorter,
less expensive, and hopefully more vibrant event. Also, a new "cluster"
model will be employed in which Divisions with similar interests attempt
to coordinate their programming to a larger degree. One thing to note,
it seems very likely that there will be less program slots per division.
Hence, SPSMM members might want to consider putting more material into
poster presentations.
From
APA CEO Ray Fowler
Dr.
Ray Fowler (a SPSMM member) reported that APA has approximately 91,500
member and 65,800 affiliates. Retention of APA members is an increasingly
key issue. Membership gains are lessening, due primarily to members
aging, retiring, and becoming dues-exempt members. For example, there
will be approximately 24,000 dues-exempt members by 2013.
Ray
described issues that APA will be emphasizing to the US Congress include:
parity for mental health, patients' bill of rights, and Medicare General
Medical Education (GME) funding (The GME funding is a major win for
the profession. See http://www.apa.org/monitor/feb99/case.html
for an overview of the issue). APA members are asked to send messages
to Congress regarding these important issues. On another note, APA continues
to strive to be a model employer. APA is closer to reaching its goals
of optimal ethnicity and gender representation in all employment categories.
The
American Psychological Foundation (APF) has started a campaign to raise
$7 million over the next five years to provide scholarships and grants
for psychological research and innovative programs. Contributions to
APF are requested.
From
APA CFO Charles McKay
Mr.
McKay updated Council on APA's finances. While dues may seem high at
renewal time, only approximately 16% of APA operating expenses are derived
from membership dues. APA owns two fully leased and occupied buildings
that provide a very important source of non-dues revenues. APA Publications
provides another important revenue source. Council passed the final
budget for 2001 of approximately $87 million.
Main
Actions by the Council
Two
new Divisions of APA were approved: the Division of Clinical Child Psychology
(Division 53) and the Society of Pediatric Psychology (Division 54).
The motion to add "health" to the APA mission statement was
approved (i.e., "The objects of the APA shall be to advance psychology
as a science and profession and as a means of promoting health
and human welfare by the encouragement of psychology in all its branches
."
[Italics indicate one of the recommended changes]). APA members will
vote on the recommendation.
The
Ethics Code Task Force is seeking comments on the Draft of the Ethical
Principles of Psychologists and Code of Conduct. (The Draft was
published in the February 2001 APA Monitor.) A related, controversial
proposal to Council is that ethics adjudication by APA's Ethics Committee
be limited to expellable behaviors. The proposal recommends that educative
efforts of the APA Ethics Committee be enhanced and expanded. A primary
reason for this proposal is to reduce the very high cost to APA of pursuing
all complaints against APA members.
The
Resolution on End of Life Issues was approved without much debate.
In contrast, The Resolution on Assisted Suicide was highly controversial.
This debate centered on whether or not psychologists should (or ethically
could) be involved in working with people who were planning their suicide.
The issue arose in part due to Oregon's Death with Dignity Act (i.e.,
physician assisted suicide is now legal in one state). The APA resolution
neither endorses nor opposes assisted suicide. However, it does support
APA in preparing the profession to address the issue of assisted suicide
by actions such as promoting psychologists' participation in multidisciplinary
teams and ethics committees involved with reviewing end-of-life requests
and encouraging psychologists to obtain training in the area of ethics
as it applies to end-of-life decisions and care. (See http://www.apa.org/pi/aseolf.html
and http://www.apa.org/monitor/dec00/inthepi.html
for more details on the original report.) The resolution was approved
by a very close vote.
The
Commission on Education and Training Leading to Licensure in Psychology
presented its report. The most controversial aspect is the recommendation
that the currently required one year of post doctoral supervision be
moved to predoctoral (e.g., accounted for by practica). If successfully
implemented, psychology graduates would be eligible for licensure immediately
upon graduation. However, many people note potential problems with the
recommendations, including: (a) risks associated with revising each
state or province's psychology's rules and regulations in order to implement
these modifications, (b) the loss of professional mobility between jurisdictions
while various jurisdictions' rules and regulations are in flux, and
(c) the perception that psychology is seeking to reduce the rigor of
its licensure requirements at the same time it is experiencing increasing
pressure from masters-level mental health professionals and is seeking
to expand its scope of practice by adding prescription privileges. The
report will be circulated to appropriate APA Committees and other governance
groups. It will also be sent to external groups, including State Associations,
for review. The report may be amended prior to its return to Council
for a decision about adoption of the recommendation.
Like
the earlier Warning Signs public service announcement, APA has
collaborated with other organizations to develop a new, powerful PSA
addressing violence prevention - ACT (Adults and Children Together)
Against Violence. I believe it will be get significant attention
(see http://www.apa.org/pi/pii/act.html
for information about it).
Let
me know if you have any questions or comments about Council activities.
The
26th Conference on Men and Masculinity 
The
National Organization for Men Against Sexism presents the 26th Conference
on Men and Masculinity (M&M26) at the University of Denver, Denver,
Colorado, July 20-22, 2001. The theme is MANifesting Global Justice:
Creating Inclusive Communities
The
Men and Masculinity conference is the premiere occasion for activists,
academics, and any other interested and concerned people to gather,
organize, educate and work for social justice and gender equality.
Join NOMAS in Denver for 3 days of workshops, keynotes, cultural events
and general discussion on the issues surrounding men and masculinity
in the 21st century. Nationally noted speakers and panelists will conduct
sessions on topics
including fathering, men & spirituality, health & workplace
issues, racism, homophobia and more. Three all-day institutes on July
20th will include Ending
Men's Violence, Undoing Racism, and the 13th national Men's Studies
Association meeting.
For
information and registration, including call for presenters please visit
us on the web at www.nomas.org or
write us at info@nomas.org
Call
for Nominations to the Committee on
Women
in Psychology
The
American Psychological Association's Committee on Women in Psychology
(CWP) is seeking nominations for two new members to begin terms in January
2002. The committee functions as a catalyst by interacting with and
making recommendations to the various parts of the APA's governing structure,
the APA's membership, and the Society for the of Psychology of Women,
as well as to other relevant groups. Additionally, the committee collects
information and documentation concerning the status of women and develops
the means by which the participation of women in roles and functions
of the profession could be increased.
Committee
members plan, develop, and coordinate various activities regarding the
status of women. CWP's present strategic initiatives include translating
research in women's health to practice, women and work, and women in
psychology careers. The committee is interested in persons with demonstrated
interest and experience in women's issues to serve a three-year term
beginning in January 2002 and ending in December 2004. For this term,
CWP seeks at least one member actively involved in research. To fulfill
the committee's commitment to full diversity in representation, one
of the slates should be filled by an openly identified lesbian psychologist.
Letters of nomination should clearly describe the candidate's specific
qualifications relative to these criteria.
Selected
candidates will be required to attend two committee meetings a year
in Washington, DC, with expenses reimbursed by the APA. Members also
work on CWP priorities between meetings. If possible, members attend
a CWP meeting at their own expense held during the APA Convention.
Nomination
materials should include the nominee's qualifications, a letter from
the nominee indicating willingness to serve on CWP and a current curriculum
vita. Self-nominations are also encouraged. APA nominations are open
to members who are retired or employed less than full time. Nominations
and supporting materials should be sent by September 1, 2001, to Stephanie
Olmstead-Dean of the APA Women's Programs Office, 750 First Street,
N.E., Washington, DC, 20002-4242.
Gender
Goes to the Movies: A Look at
Alternative
Sex Roles in
Mainstream Film
How
are "gender performances" scripted in popular films? How are
gender-variant characters portrayed? What consequences are depicted
for transgressing gender norms? What is the relationship between the
way gender is scripted in film and our own lives? These will be some
of the questions that will be explored in this interactive session.
Film clips from popular movies, such as "Boys Don't Cry, "Mulan,"
and "The Crying Game" will be discussed. This session is co-sponsored
by Divisions 17, 35, 44 and 51 and will take place from 1-2 p.m. on
Saturday, August 25th in the Division 35 Hospitality Suite. For more
information, contact Holly Sweet (hbsweet@mit.edu)
Division
51 Social Activism
Ive Eicken: Co-Chair, Task Force for Social Activism
In
response to conversations on the SPSSM list serve, Mike Andronico (president
Division 51) asked me to co-chair an ad hoc committee for social activism.
We decided that the best time to kick off this effort was at the upcoming
(2000) APA convention. It was short notice, but we were able to arrange
for Pete Seegar to play as the opening entertainment, and for Ralph
Nader to speak. When Pete broke into "Where have all the Flowers
Gone" and "If I Had a Hammer" there wasn't a dry eye
in the house. Mr. Nader was well informed, and passionate about improving
the lot of the American people. What a grand way to kick off a social
activism campaign.
Well,
Ok, maybe we weren't totally responsible for those two events, but they
remain terrific backgrounds for the beginning of our work. I felt proud
of the APA for bringing Pete Seeger's voice to the young psychologists
in the room. I didn't realize how long he had been singing about change,
until I bought his greatest hits album, and heard unionization and strikebusting
songs that he sang with Guthrie (no, not Arlo, Woddie) in the '40's.
At 82 years of age, Pete still compels us to see things that make us
squirm. Singing with his grandson, he is a wonderful example of a kind
and strong masculinity that mentors, and passes his values along to
younger men. We should all follow his example. Division 51 doesn't need
to agree on which values we should pass on, or promote. I don't think
we could. That isn't the point, or even important. What is important
is that we actively promote our own individual values. Each of us is
informed by an experience, and an exceedingly expensive education, that
is important to promoting positive change in society, and masculinity.
It is delightful that gender role journey theory notes that social activism
is an inherent feature and natural outgrowth of a developed masculinity.
Mike
Andronico started that process weeks before the APA convention. We were
having a hard time identifying volunteer opportunities that fit our
division through the APA contact working on ordinary pro bono service
at the APA convention. Mike took up the challenge, and spent a frustrating
afternoon, making phone calls to Washington. With Neil Massoth's help,
Mike found a group of mental health clinics (the D.C. Commission on
Mental Health Services, Child and Youth Service Administration) whose
director, Dr. Kemba A. Maish accepted his offer for a free consultation
at their weekly staff conference . He finally found a treatment center
for troubled boys who wanted an in-service training. When the time came,
he and Vic Frazio hailed a cab to go to the center. They thought it
rather odd that the cab driver didn't know where the address for the
center was. Later they discovered that he was having one of those convenient
lapses in memory that would have kept him out of a bad part of town.
The in-service training was a great success. Mike presented on filial
therapy, an approach which teaches participants to conduct play sessions
at home with their children, and Vic pitched in with helping to deal
with parents. A lively question and answer session followed. We can
all be proud of Mike and Vic for going.
I was able to spend a morning helping serve breakfast at So Others May
Eat (SOME). I know that it sounds trite, but I got much more from the
experience than did the men I served. First of all I was astounded at
the service delivery that was provided. It was as it should/could be.
Well coordinated, and complete, they had everything from a hot meal
to dentists, and social workers. It was an inspiration, and I'm determined
to find a way to participate in a similar operation as soon as it is
practical for me, even if I have to build it myself..... which might
be the best way!
The
most important thing about serving at SOME were the connections. Besides
connecting with 430+ plates of ham and eggs, there were wonderful people.
Some of the volunteers were a family who brought a church group from
another state. It was great to watch the adults work right along with
the children in order to help people they didn't even know. I wasn't
the only person from APA, either. Since the APA organized that effort
I was able to work with, and enjoyed a wonderful walk back to the convention
with another psychologist. Volunteering gave me the opportunity to experience
these wonderful people, in addition to the staff at SOME, and the community
that the APA visited. It feels presumptuous to claim that I may have
connected with the men who came for breakfast, and yet we must have
more understanding of each other than if the psychologists had not gone
at all.
It
was interesting, and somewhat upsetting that I served only men. I learned
that they have two dining rooms, one for men, and another for women
and children. They are separated because apparently the men harassed
the women, and women were uncomfortable bringing their children. Of
course, this is an extreme example, but masculinity issues were everywhere.
There is no better work for Division 51, and nowhere is it more needed
than in social activism.
It is important that we do what suits each of us; not what we feel we
should, or ought to do. Some of us may donate money to our favorite
cause. Others will mentor a boy, or disadvantaged student. We may provide
pro bono services and we may choose to get into the trenches and serve
a meal, or build a house. At minimum we can encourage and support our
members who are able to take a more active role. What we do is not important.
What is important is that we all do something.
There
will be another activism project at the APA convention in San Francisco.
Several divisions are participating in coordination. It's a big sacrifice
to take several hours out of your convention scheduling to participate
in community service. It isn't right for everyone. On the other hand
it's a great way to become involved, and a very public statement that
psychologists, specifically Division 51 members, care about our participation
in the world. If you would like to join in, please email Iverson Eicken
at: iverson@cowboy.net.
Who
Are the 'Men' in "Men's Health?"
Will H. Courtenay, PhD, LCSW
Sonoma State University
and
Men's Health Consulting
e-mail: courtenay@menshealth.org
The
following paper is based on Dr. Courtenay's discussant's remarks for
the symposium Men's Health in the New Millennium: Emerging Research
Theory and Practice chaired by Dr. Rod Hetzel at the 108th Convention
of the American Psychological Association in Washington, D.C.
First,
I want to extend my gratitude to our chair Dr. Roderick Hetzel for his
foresight and initiative in convening this symposium. I am also grateful
to my colleagues on this panel for their excellent and timely work.
I'm going to comment on it further in a moment. But I want to begin
by taking this opportunity to confront another one of our colleagues
in this room.
This
fellow has been revered for decades, and perhaps for that reason, his
authority is rarely challenged. But despite his power and influence,
he has seriously undermined our work. His continued influence in our
field represents a major barrier to the advancement of our true understanding
of masculinity and men's health.
Who's
this fellow I'm referring to? He's "The Male Gender Role."
Now,
it would be against my principles to do violence to this fellow. I would,
however, like to see him laid to rest. But despite being very old and
basically on life support, we keep breathing new life into him every
day.
Let
me tell you five problems I have with this old guy.
The
first problem is that The Male Gender Role would have us believe that
masculinity resides solely in each man's individual psychology. With
a slight of hand, he blinds us to the social systems - such as school
and work places - that are powerful influences in shaping masculinity.
The
second problem is that The Male Gender Role normalizes masculinity and
implies that manhood is some kind of universal experience. He's rather
narcissistic that way. He thinks every man in the world is just like
him - White, middle-class, heterosexual, and in college.
The
third problem I have with this guy is that to keep his feeble identity
propped up, he leans heavily on unfounded biological assumptions. He
thinks it's just "natural" - and inevitable - that men and
women differ.
The
fourth problem with this fellow - perhaps due to senility - is that
he doesn't seem to have any memory of the past. It would seem he has
no history.
The fifth problem with The Male Gender Role? He never seems to change.
He'd have us believe that masculinity is fixed and constant.
You
may be asking yourself, "Why all this concern about The Male Gender
Role in a symposium on men's health?" It's because The Male Gender
Role limits the ways that we understand men and conceptualize men's
psychology - and consequently, how we understand and think about men's
health. It keeps us from asking the most important question: "Who
are the men in 'men's health?'"
So, what might emerging psychologies - or disciplines - of men's health
look like when we finally give up our fight to keep The Male Gender
Role alive? Well, to begin with, new paradigms would address the five
points that I've just mentioned.
First,
they'd look beyond individuals. As people interested in psychology,
we tend to think that everything begins and ends with individuals. But
our lives and the world are never simply a matter of individual people
- or what we think, what we feel, and what we do. We're always participating
in social systems that are larger than us - families, schools, and the
APA.
We
live in dynamic relationship with these social systems. They shape our
sense of who we are, our relationships, our place in the world, our
gender, and our health behavior.
So
with new paradigms, we wouldn't simply think of men's health as something
about individual people - our personalities or our biology. We'd think
about how men's health gets shaped by social systems - like dangerous
worksites, poor communities, and the health care system.
New
paradigms would also acknowledge the biological systems that influence
men's health and psychologies - like our brains. Every month, there
are new findings about sex differences in brain functioning - such as
women moving more quickly than men between the left and right sides
of the brain.
This
research may help to explain long-reported gender differences in emotional
expression. Putting words to emotions requires both hemispheres of the
brain - the right side to experience emotions and the left side to articulate
them.
Now this is not to say that men's brains are simply hard wired to be
inexpressive and that this gender difference is immutable. On the contrary,
we're also learning how the environment shapes brain development - as
do social systems. Men and boys learn that they gain greater social
advantages when they remain stoic.
New paradigms would enable us to better understand the complex interplay
between these social and biological influences on men's health. And
to do this will require interdisciplinary methods - not simply multidisciplinary
ones.
The second problem I mentioned in regard to The Male Gender Role, is
that it universalizes masculinity. Note the term's very language: the
male gender role - as if men have only one gender role.
Take
Brannon and David's influential and enduring model of masculinity. One
of their four constructs is for a man to be "a sturdy oak."
But we never distinguish between the "sturdy oaks" that grow
in wealthy White suburbs and the "sturdy oaks" that grow in
poor Black, urban neighborhoods.
We're
hearing more these days about the disturbing six- to seven-year difference
in the lifespans of women and men. But new paradigms must recognize
that there's a greater difference in the lifespans of Black and White
men than there is between women and men. African American men die eight
years younger than European American men. In fact, men of color account
for much of the gender difference in mortality.
So,
these new models would acknowledge differences among men. They'd recognize
that there's no one masculinity, there are many masculinities - and
many gender roles.
Not
all men endorse traditional beliefs about manhood. Men with less education
and lower family income are more likely to endorse them - as are African
Americans. But even among Black men there are differences; younger,
nonprofessional men hold more traditional beliefs than older, professional
men.
And what about gay men - what's their masculinity? We rarely stop to
ask ourselves that question because The Male Gender Role marginalizes
these men. What's the masculinity of Latino gay men? Or, the masculinity
of Chicano men in Albuquerque who have sex with men? Does it differ
from the masculinity of queer, activist Latino men in San Francisco?
And how do these masculinities, contexts, cultures, and communities
influence the sexual risks and other health behaviors of these men?
New, emerging models of masculinity and men's health could explore these
questions.
They
could also challenge biologically based assumptions about women and
men - the third problem. The Male Gender Role is based on the belief
that we are our biologies - that there must be essential differences
between women and men simply because male and female reproductive organs
differ.
But
new paradigms would recognize that to maintain this notion of gender
as difference has required that we disregard decades of research indicating
that - at least psychologically - men and women are more similar than
dissimilar. They'd remind us that findings of gender difference often
result from small statistical differences between a minority of the
population - and that they rarely represent categorical differences
between all men and all women.
The
fourth problem I mentioned is a lack of historical perspective. We forget
or simply don't acknowledge the fact that in the first half of the nineteenth
century, there was little concern among men about physical strength.
It was not physical strength, but strength of character that was valued
among men.
When
it comes to men's bodies, the last several decades have witnessed significant
changes. Dr. McCreary has discussed elsewhere that the cultural standard
for men's bodies has become increasingly large and muscular. Through
better understanding the history, evolution and the vicissitudes of
masculinity, we'll better understand the full range of its potential.
And,
finally, the new paradigm would recognize that masculinity is not fixed
or static. The same man demonstrates masculinity differently in different
contexts. He may believe that it's not O.K. to cry at work or in front
of peers, but that it is O.K. to cry at home or with his wife.
A
man's psychology is one way when he's with his street gang and another
way when he's with his children.
And
men's beliefs about manhood can and do change over time. Some men reinforce
and reproduce traditional masculinity. But other men redefine and transform
it. Still other men resist traditional standards and create they're
own standards of manhood. Other men simply reject any relevance of masculinity
at all.
So
to truly understand masculinity and men's health - whether we're practitioners
or researchers - we need to consider them within the contexts in which
they occur and at what age, time, and place they occur.
Well,
I'd like to return now to the excellent work of my colleagues on this
panel. Let's take a look at some of the important questions their findings
raise - questions that researchers and theorists of a new, emerging
discipline of men's health might address.
As
a result of Dr. McCreary's research, we finally understand something
about how men think about their weight, and how their perceptions of
their bodies might contribute to their being overweight. He and his
colleague Dr. Stanley Sadava explored the interaction between gender,
weight, and self-perception in a large community-based sample of adults
(McCreary & Sadava, 2000).
The results of their study indicate that although men are more likely
than women to be overweight, men think they weigh less than they really
do - and, in comparison to overweight women, men who are overweight
rate themselves as more attractive, healthier, and higher in life satisfaction.
Furthermore, among underweight adults, women rate themselves as more
attractive, healthier, and higher in life satisfaction than men.
Now
the women and men in this study are from eastern Canada. Although more
U.S. men than women are also overweight, will the findings of men's
perceptions hold true for men in the United States? Geography certainly
plays a role in men's health. Being overweight is strongly linked with
cardiovascular disease which is the leading killer of men. But the death
rate for cardiovascular disease is highest in the Southern United States.
What accounts for this? Is it a Southern diet? Or is it something about
Southern men's views about manhood?
National
data indicate that Southern men hold the most traditional views about
gender. But the geography's even more specific. Rural Southern men have
the most traditional views - and data suggest these men also have more
health problems.
And
how does the media - as a social system - influence these perceptions,
and men's weight and dietary habits. Dr. McCreary's prior research indicates
that watching television can foster inaccurate weight perceptions. But
how exactly does this happen? And what about movies and magazines?
In
the study by Mr. Loscalzo and his colleagues (Loscalzo, Hooker, Zabora,
& Bucher, 2000), over 5,729 patients with cancer completed the Brief
Symptom Inventory, a 53-item self-report symptom scale. Among the results
that Mr. Loscalzo presented were the findings that more men than women
with cancer reported practical problems - such as parking and insurance
-and that more women reported pain and psychosocial problems - such
as problems with emotions and communication with children. However,
they also found no gender differences in the experience of anxiety or
depression, and - in the case of lung cancer - they found that more
men reported somatic complaints.
Why
is it that one and one half times more women than men in this study
experienced pain with cancer? There's evidence that hormones likely
play some role in mediating pain. But we also know that psychosocial
factors do too. In front of a female clinician _ for example _ men are
less likely to report pain. So how do hormones and the gender of clinicians'
- or researchers' - influence the reporting of pain among cancer patients?
Now
their finding of no difference in depression between men and women -
though not statistically significant - is, nonetheless, a significant
finding. This result - which challenges popular myth that men simply
don't get depressed - is consistent with findings from other groups
as well, like college students.
But let's assume that the people in this study are somewhat representative
of the population and that more women than men were depressed to begin
with. Does this finding suggest that men are more likely than women
to experience depression in response to cancer? And, if so, why?
Are
there gender differences in the way people with cancer cope with depression?
Among people, in general, with depression, men are more likely than
women to rely on themselves, withdraw socially, and to try to talk themselves
out of depression. Do these differences disappear when a man gets cancer?
Or, do they intensify?
Dr.
Diefenbach (2000) presented findings from a study designed to explore
treatment expectations, distress, and treatment decision making among
more than 300 men diagnosed with early stage prostate cancer. Compared
to men who chose surgery, those who chose radiation or seed therapy
did so because they expected it to have fewer side-effects, to be more
convenient, and to be less painful and invasive, even though they were
less convinced that these treatments would provide the best chance of
a cure. Patients who chose radiation also reported significantly less
distress about their treatment choice, lower levels of distress during
the decision-making process, and greater satisfaction with ongoing treatment.
Now,
in this study, 90 percent of the men were European American, and we
don't know their socioeconomic status or sexual orientation. And research
indicates that economically disadvantaged people, sexual minorities,
and people of color have very different health care experiences than
do White, middle-class heterosexuals. Future researchers might explore
whether the treatment expectations and decisions, and levels of distress,
differ among men based on their ethnicity, class, and sexual orientation.
Roughly
half of the men in Diefenbach's study chose surgery. How might class,
ethnicity and sexual orientation influence these decisions? Black patients
rate their doctors - and their doctor's decision-making styles - as
less participatory than Whites do. Black men also trust doctors less.
It would seem that these factors would influence surgery decisions -
which do differ among groups. A study this year found that the rate
of glaucoma surgery among Blacks is nearly 50% below what it should
be compared to Whites.
And
how would distrust and less participation by clinicians influence Black
men's satisfaction with radiation? Would their satisfaction be as high
as it is for White men? And how does the relative social power and privilege
of clinicians and patients influence both decision-making and satisfaction?
Mr.
Mills (2000) reported the results of a study designed to assess health
knowledge and skills among 11,691 students from all 172 Rhode Island
elementary schools. The findings indicated that being White, upper-class,
and female were all significant predictors of greater health knowledge
and skills.
These findings are consistent with many other studies of both adolescents
and adults that show that men are less knowledgeable about health in
general and about specific diseases, and skills for risk reduction.
Future researchers might explore what it is exactly about gender that
contributes to these differences. Is it due to the fact that men and
boys are less likely than women and girls to perceive themselves at
risk for health problems? Is it that men and boys consider health knowledge
and skill acquisition to be feminine endeavors?
And
what about SES? One of the strengths of Mr. Mills' work is that it examines
the interaction of SES and ethnicity, with gender. And, indeed, it was
not gender, but SES, that was the strongest predictor of knowledge.
But how exactly does SES interact with gender and ethnicity? We have
much to learn about these kinds of intensely complex interactions.
Now,
simply because men and boys are less knowledgeable about health, doesn't
mean that they can't learn about it. Indeed, the findings from Dr. Shankar
and Ms. Goldson's study (2000) of the Men's Preventive Health Counseling
Program in Boston suggest otherwise.
The
program - administered by Action for Boston Community Development -
is designed to provide comprehensive family planning, reproductive,
and sexual health care services for lower income African American and
Latino men. The study's preliminary results suggest that the program
has been successful in increasing men's level of knowledge of - and
their involvement in - family planning, reproductive health, and sexual
health care. They also suggest that the program has positively influenced
men's beliefs about manhood, men's behavior, and men's readiness to
adopt healthy habits.
The
study's findings also raise important questions about differences among
men based on their age. Younger men in their program endorsed several
beliefs that increase the chances of unwanted pregnancies. What accounts
for these age-based differences? The truth is, we know very little about
developmental differences in men's and boys' health beliefs - and the
effects of these beliefs on their well-being.
Family
planning clinics are increasingly addressing the needs of men. It seems
most men would support this change. Research shows that men generally
believe that preventing pregnancy is a shared responsibility - which
is consistent with the findings of Dr. Shankar and Ms. Goldson.
Research
also shows that programs that involve men do result in positive outcomes
for men and their partners. But in order for these programs to be most
effective, we need to learn what it is exactly that makes them successful.
In the Boston program, all of the counselors are men. What significance,
if any, does this have on men's knowledge, beliefs, and behaviors over
time?
Emerging paradigms offer new promise for understanding the pathways
through which social relationships among men influence men's health.
New research indicates that some men are reluctant to address their
health needs for fear that they will be perceived by other men to be
unmanly or gay. Research also shows that men can positively influence
each other through group discussions about health.
Well,
as for our own group discussion here, I hope the practitioners and researchers
on this panel have influenced you - and inspired you as much as they've
inspired me. There are many yet unanswered questions about men's health.
During
the last century, we were enormously successful in addressing the health
part of men's health. But as we think about men's health and search
for answers in the new millennium - and as we guide emerging research,
theory, and practice - we need also to ask ourselves "Who are the
men in 'men's health?'"
NOTE:
The author wishes to acknowledge Michael Messner for the inspiration
he provided for this paper in: Messner, M.A. (1998) The limits of 'the
male sex role': The discourse of the men's liberation and men's rights
movements. Gender & Society, 12, 255-276.
References
Diefenbach,
M.A. (2000, August). Treatment decision-making preferences among patients
with early stage prostate cancer. In R. Hetzel (Chair), Men's health
in the new millennium: Emerging research theory and practice. Symposium
conducted at the 108th Convention of the American Psychological Association,
Washington, DC.
Loscalzo,
M.J., Hooker, C.M., Zabora, J.R., & Bucher, J.A. (2000, August).
How men manage the ongoing challenges of cancer. In R. Hetzel (Chair),
Men's health in the new millennium: Emerging research theory and practice.
Symposium conducted at the 108th Convention of the American Psychological
Association, Washington, DC.
McCreary,
D.R. & Sadava, S.W. (2000, August). Gender differences in adult
perceptions of body weight and their relationships to self-perceived
attractiveness, life satisfaction, and health. In R. Hetzel (Chair),
Men's health in the new millennium: Emerging research theory and practice.
Symposium conducted at the 108th Convention of the American Psychological
Association, Washington, DC.
Mills,
D.S. (2000, August). Health knowledge of young males: Understanding
and preventing negative health behaviors of men. In R. Hetzel (Chair),
Men's health in the new millennium: Emerging research theory and practice.
Symposium conducted at the 108th Convention of the American Psychological
Association, Washington, DC.
Shankar,
R., & Goldson, I. (2000, August). Sexual health of lower income
African American and Latino adult males. In R. Hetzel (Chair), Men's
health in the new millennium: Emerging research theory and practice.
Symposium conducted at the 108th Convention of the American Psychological
Association, Washington, DC.
Psychology of
Men and Masculinity
Psychology
of Men and Masculinity is among the world's first scholarly publications
devoted to the dissemination of research, theory, and clinical scholarship
that advance the discipline of the psychology of men and masculinity.
This discipline is defined broadly as the study of how men's psychology
is influenced and shaped by gender, and by the process of masculinization,
in both its socially constructed and biological forms. We welcome scholarship
that advances our understanding of men's psychology, across the life
span, across racial and ethnic groups, and across time.
Examples
of relevant topics include, but are not limited to, the processes and
consequences of male gender socialization, including its impact on men's
health, behavior, interpersonal relationships, emotional development,
violence, and psychological well-being; assessment and measurement of
the masculine gender role; gender role strain, stress, and conflict;
masculinity ideology; fathering; men's utilization of psychological
services; conceptualization and assessment of interventions addressing
men's understanding of masculinity; sexuality and sexual orientation;
biological aspects of male development; and the victimization of male
children and adults.
Submitted
manuscripts must be written in the style outlined in the 1994 Publication Manual of the American Psychological
Association (fourth edition). Psychology of Men and Masculinity will accept both regular length
submissions (7,500 words) and brief reports (2,500 words). Submitted
manuscripts must not have been previously published and must not be
under consideration for publication elsewhere.
Four
copies of the manuscript should be mailed to: David Lisak, PhD, Editor,
Psychology of Men and Masculinity, Department
of Psychology, University of Massachusetts Boston, 100 Morrissey Blvd.,
Boston, MA 02125-3393.
Nominations
for Fellows
Nominations
for Felow Status in divisions 51, APA are presently being accepted.
If you are aware of a member who has been exemplary in the areas of
Research or Service for the Psychology of Males and Masculinity (or
if you yourself fit the mold), please forward names by September 1 to
Marty Wong, Ph.D.; Fellows Chair; 15 Elizabeth St.; Charleston, SC 29403
(email: barbatwong@aol.com)
Special Focus Section: The Essential
Father
Editor
for Special Focus Section: Steven Abell, Ph.D.
In
recent years, some social theorists have begun to question the essential
nature of paternal involvement in child development. It is my view that
these authors have made an understandable but deeply misguided conclusion.
Their thinking seems to be based on the idea, gleaned from the experience
of industrialized societies in the twentieth century, that the father's
role in the family was simply that of providing financial or material
support for other family members. With the increased earning potential
of women, the role of the father then becomes superfluous or at least
non-essential. This is an ahistorical approach to fatherhood, which
seems to forget that for hundreds of years many mothers and fathers
worked side by side on family farms, in which both were important economic
contributors (producing the goods the family needed) as well as being
involved parents. The family functioned then as a unit, and the father's
purpose in life went well beyond that of economic provider (though this
was one important aspect of his role).
To
rediscover the true meaning and place of fatherhood in family life,
it is my conviction that we must overcome the monetary preoccupations
of the capitalist society in which we live, and realize that bread-winning
is only one component of fatherhood. By defining a more inclusive concept
of father involvement, which includes bread-winning along with a host
of other activities, I believe Joseph Pleck's contribution to this special
focus section is an important step in the right direction. When we define
fatherhood more broadly, we can then begin to look at both the instrumental
and the emotional aspects of paternity.
An
interesting question to ask, however, is why efforts were made to restrict
the role of fathers to begin with. This may have a great deal to do
with the long hours that many twentieth century fathers spent working
away from home and the presence of their young children, as well as
the with impact of numerous other factors that negatively influenced
fathering, such as wide-spread divorce, the incompatibility of nurturing
with a macho male gender role, and the typically dismissive portrayal
of fathers in the popular media. When taken together, these factors
lead many of us to grow up with a tremendous sense of pain and loss
around our own fathers, and a deep feeling that these men were not with
us in the ways that we needed them to be. It may now be easier for us
to ignore the emotional aspects of fatherhood or to denigrate and diminish
paternity all together, than it is to look at the sadness within us.
I think the courageous pieces of Neil Chetnik and Ronald Levant in this
special focus section do much to show the vital importance of father's
in emotional development, and that the universal need for a father does
not diminish as one reaches adulthood.
In
my own contribution to this Special Focus Section, I hope that David
Schwartz and I have given the reader some sense that the father-child
relationship is not a one way street. It is our belief that while father's
can greatly contribute to the development of their daughters and sons,
fatherhood is also one of the most significant opportunities for the
lifelong growth and development of adult men. When taken together, it
is my hope that the four articles in this special focus section will
represent a sincere effort to illustrate two of the most fundamental
truths about family life - that we parent as gendered beings, and that
fathers, like mothers, are essential.
Fatherhood
as a Growth Experience: Expanding Humanistic Theories of Paternity
Steven
Abell and David Schwartz
(this
article is a summary or a longer piece by the same authors, which originally
appeared under the same title in The Humanistic Psychologist, volume
27(2),1999, pp.221-241)
20
years have passed since Dustin Hoffman portrayed a father battling for
his custody rights in the movie Kramer vs. Kramer. This groundbreaking
film first brought into popular consciousness the importance of equal
rights for fathers, and helped to place a new emphasis on understanding
the role of fathers. Two decades later however, men are still trying
to understand how fathering fits into their lives, and how paternity
fits into our current construction of masculinity.
Since
Hoffman's portrayal of a man in discovery of his fathering potential,
the amount of research conducted on the subject of fatherhood has vastly
increased. Even with this increase, however, the amount of data available
on fatherhood is still miniscule in comparison to other areas of adult
life, such as intimacy or identity development (for some notable exceptions
to the scarcity of work on fatherhood see the scholarship of Michael
Lamb, Ronald Levant, or Joseph Pleck). In the last two centuries scholars
and social critics have moved from the Victorian-era view of the father
as a "moral teacher" to the post world war II "breadwinner",
to the 1960's "sex role model" and ultimately to our current
notion of a "new nurturant father"(Lamb, 1986, p.4-6).
Yet
even as social thinkers have begun to speculate that fathers can be
crucial in the nurturing of young children, little research has been
done on fathering. What research studies have been conducted typically
focus on how fathers affect the development of their children (Marsiglio,
1993), rather than looking at how the process of parenting may influence
the father's overall course of life. For a man to make a long-term commitment
to the care of his children may be regarded by many as a moral duty
or point of honor, but little has been said about the importance of
fathering in a man's healthy emotional growth and development.
The
Influence of Sociobiology
In
recent years, the field of psychology may have unwittingly supported
the lack of interest in fathering, as evolutionary psychology has promulgated
the notion of what Blankenhorn (1995) referred to with great concern
as "the sperm father" (p. 171). Sociobiologists such as Barash
(1977), Buss (1989, 1991), Cunningham (1981), and many others who operate
from the perspective of evolutionary psychology, have argued that men
and women approach parenting in radically different ways.
Males, who are biologically capable of fathering numerous offspring
with only a minimal investment of time and energy, are motivated, according
to this theory, to mate with as many females as possible and avoid the
constrictions of monogamy. Females, on the other hand, who must invest
long periods of time in the gestation, nursing and care of a limited
number of offspring, are allegedly motivated to restrict their sexual
behavior, and to select high status males who can provide resources
for the rearing of their children. Buss (1989) did offer impressive
support for this theory with his cross-cultural research.
While
this perspective may well explain certain aspects of lust and initial
sexual attraction, the theory has many shortcomings. For instance, this
theory says nothing about the emotional ramifications for men who follow
what Barash (1977) referred to as "love 'em and leave 'em"
(p. 48) strategy of reproduction. Under the rubric of evolutionary psychology,
one would think that a man who sired thousands of children, but who
failed to have a relationship with any of them, would die as a happy
and fulfilled individual, since this sexually unconstrained male did
much to foster the survival of his genes. Common sense would suggest,
on the other hand, that this position denies everything that we know
about the relational capacities and nurturing abilities of men.
Society
and the Changing Father
Part
of our reluctance to look at the role of fathering in a man's life,
may also stem from the anxiety producing changes that various social
forces have brought upon a father's role in his family. One of the earliest
and most crucial factors to alter fatherhood was the industrial revolution
(Bly, 1990; Gilbert, 1992). With the industrial revolution, work moved
away from the home. Fathers, who were once an almost constant presence
on the farm family, were forced to work long hours away from their children
and spouses.
Current
confusion about the meaning of fatherhood in a man's life may have lead
to much of the dichotomy that many social observers are noticing between
involved and uninvolved fathers. Furstenberg (1988) called attention
to the simultaneous rise of "good dads" who are more involved
and emotionally present with their children than fathers of the past,
and "bad dads" who are more absent from their families. Furstenberg's
research suggests that there has been a simultaneous rise in both types
of fathers since the 1950's. While deadbeat or negligent fathers are
now legendary in our culture, few scholars have seriously examined the
motives of this growing group of men. The research of Herzog (1982)
suggested that fatherhood is likely to continue with its present decline,
unless social theorists can develop a new and more workable model of
paternity.
Optimal
Male Development
To
promote fathering, it may well be necessary to understand how fatherhood
can contribute to optimal male development. Lerner and Kreppner (1989)
argued that much of the scholarship on parenting focuses on how parents
influence children, rather than on the dyadic interactions through which
children also shape and alter their parents. This gap is particularly
true of fatherhood, in terms of how children can ideally contribute
to a man's emotional growth and development. Luckily, existing humanistic
models of optimal adult development can offer some guidance for fathers
and for professionals who work with fathers.
The
logical starting point in any humanistically oriented discussion of
adulthood is probably Maslow's (1954, 1968) famous hierarchy of needs,
which culminates with the individual's need for self-actualization.
A significant problem exists with Maslow's pyramid, however, if it is
to be applied to paternity. Maslow suggested that self-actualization
was a being or growth motive, while belongingness and love needs were
deficit motives from a lower level of Maslow's linear progression. This
position assumes that self-fulfillment can be achieved in a western,
autonomous fashion, in which the relational aspects of self-actualization
are assigned a subordinate role in the grand scheme of one's life. It
is probably unfair to blame Maslow for the individualistic nature of
his theory, since he was after all, a male psychologist in North America,
who wrote before the groundbreaking work of Gilligan (1982), Chodorow
(1978, 1989) and other feminist authors. By arguing for the normalcy
and health of feminine relatedness, feminist psychological theorists
such as Gilligan and Chodorow have called into question any theory that
places an individual's belongingness and love needs in a subordinate
position.
The
work of these feminist theorists suggests that for both genders, a person's
belongingness and love needs should not be viewed as deficit motives.
It may be more useful instead to view the universal human desire for
interpersonal connection as a subset of what Maslow (1954, 1968) described
as the growth motives. In this way, individuals who achieve self-actualization
through their relationship with a significant other will no longer be
pathologized.
A
more interpersonally productive way for men to think about their development
and about fatherhood in particular, may be to blend Maslow's (1954,
1968) notion of self-actualization with Marcel's (1964) concept of creative
fidelity. Marcel has suggested that people will find psychological authenticity,
or become more fully alive, only when they commit themselves to one
another in bonds of faithfulness. This type of fidelity is "creative",
in that the partners redefine themselves through the relationship. The
profound interpersonal commitments, which Marcel described, may be the
ultimate growth experience, and a less western or autonomous route to
self-actualization.
For
men, fatherhood today can be one of the greatest opportunities for this
type of creative fidelity. A father can discover many new aspects of
the self, out of his caring for and commitment to another person. Fatherhood
should be redefined from the traditional good provider role, to the
notion of fatherhood as a growth experience.
In
this way, fatherhood can be a chief way for men to achieve what the
child psychoanalyst and developmental theorist Erik Erikson (1963, 1982)
described as generativity rather than stagnation. According to Erikson,
stagnation occurs when a person becomes stale and old, preoccupied with
themselves, and is doing the same thing over and over again. Committed
fatherhood, on the other hand, involves both a significant concern for
the next generation as well as the constant acquisition of new skills.
The new knowledge that is gained from this interpersonal process will
then usher the man more soundly into Erikson's final sense of wisdom,
rather than leaving him with the despair that results from stagnation.
The
Absent Father
If
fatherhood is to be viewed as a growth experience, however, it is logical
to ask what will happen to men who lose contact with their children,
or who have been absent from the beginning. Unfortunately, in the United
States absent fathers appear to constitute a large and growing portion
of the male population. In a review of U.S. census data, Blankenhorn
(1995) reported that from 1960 to 1990, the percent of children living
with their biological fathers dropped from 82.4% to 61.7%. Part of this
decline is surely due to the increased prevalence of divorce throughout
western society.
While
divorced fathers often lose their function as meaningful co-parents,
an increasingly large group of men never establish any type of significant
social or legal relationship with their children from the onset. It
may be that with the cultural demise of fatherhood, and with few real
life role models, many men are unprepared from the start. Without positive
real life examples of paternity, many men may desperately look to the
media for images of fatherhood.
With
a lack of available father figures, a vicious cycle can ensue, in which
men never experience emotional intimacy or positive modeling with another
man, become insecure about their own masculinity, and then reject the
more nurturing and traditionally feminine aspects of parenting. In a
culture of machismo and male-insecurity over gender identity, it is
no wonder that many men reject the parenting of young children. Research
suggests that both men and women experience an increase in their femininity
when they become parents (Palm & Palkowitz, 1988). This may be a
very anxiety-producing notion for men who already struggle with issues
of gender identity. For fatherhood to be viewed as a growth process,
both our notions of fatherhood and our basic ideas about masculine gender
identity must change. If masculinity is redefined to include more nurturing
and relational aspects of the self, then it will be easier for the deadbeat
dads of today to realize that fathering can become a continuous developmental
advancement of their identity.
A
move towards a new, more pro-fathering culture of masculinity, must
also reshape the way in which men are taught to view their reproductive
potential. Men are often encouraged by the popular media to view their
ability to procreate in a hedonistic and sexualized manner, or to emphasize
their ability to sire large numbers of children in the fashion of sociobiology.
To promote this view of fathering in any way is surely to deprive men
of their dignity and potential for growth. Rarely, are men taught to
think of their reproductive potential as a positive force, which should
be handled in the careful and responsible way in which one would care
for any important legacy.
This
has negative consequences for virtually all men who either lose or never
have a real sense of relatedness with their children. In both cases
there is a loss of both creative fidelity and the discovery of one's
potential to nurture and guide. For even if a man has contact with his
children for many years, it is unlikely that he will view fathering
as one of the peak activities of his life, if he is unable to finish
the process.
To be a fully generative father is to raise one's children into adult
maturity, so that a transition can fully be made from a father who nurtures
and protects to one who is a friend and advisor. To thwart this process
prematurely is to engender the frustration and pain so often associated
with the men's rights movement, or to send the absent father into a
state of denial about his lost relationship.
Conclusions
Future
scholars, who study men and masculinity, can enhance their understanding
of fatherhood by considering a humanistic model of paternity. In this
model, the father-child relationship is considered a powerful expression
of creative fidelity, in which a man redefines himself through his love
and commitment to his child. In this way, fatherhood can optimally lead
to dyadically-experienced self-actualization and the achievement of
long-term generativity.
This
positive view of paternity may also serve as a useful antidote to the
recent demise of fathering. While it is true that more children are
now growing up in the United States without involved fathers, a cultural
change in which active fatherhood is viewed as a central component of
optimal male development could do much to reverse this trend. Since
fatherhood has always been more of a social than biological construction,
it is crucial that our society embrace a new model of how fathering
is a vital and important aspect of men's lives.
References
Barash.
D. P. (1977). Sociobiology and Behavior. New York: Elsevier.
Blankenhorn, D. (1995). Fatherless America: Confronting our most urgent
social problem. New York: Basic Books.
Bly,
R. (1990). Iron John: A book about men. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley.
Buss, D. M. (1989). Sex differences in human mate preference: Evolutionary
hypotheses tested in 37 cultures. Brain and behavior Sciences,12, 1-49.
Buss,
D. M. (1991). Evolutionary personality psychology. In M. R. Rosenzweig
and L. W. Porter (Eds.), Annual Review of Psychology. (pp. 459-491).
Palo Alto, CA: Annual Reviews, Inc.
Chodorow,
N. (1978). The Reproduction of Mothering. Berkley: University of California
Press.
Chodorow,
N. (1989). Feminism and Psychoanalytic Theory. New Haven: Yale University
Press.
Cunningham,
M. R. (1981). Sociobiology as a supplementary paradigm for social research.
In L. Wheeler (Ed.), Review of Personality and Social Psychology, 2,
(pp. 69-106). Beverly Hills, CA: Sage.
Erikson,
E. (1963). Childhood and Society. Toronto: Norton.
Erikson,
E. (1982). The life cycle completed: A review. New York: Norton.
Furstenberg,
F. F., Jr. (1988). Good dads-Bad dads: Two faces of fatherhood. In A.
J. Cherlin (Ed.), The changing American family and public policy (pp.
193-218). Washington, DC: Urban Institute.
Gilbert,
R. K. (1992). Revisiting the psychology of men: Robert Bly and the Mytho-Poetic
movement. Journal of Humanistic Psychology, 32(2), 41-67.
Gilligan,
C. (1982). In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women's Development.
Cambridge, M. A.: Harvard University Press.
Herzog,
J. (1982). Patterns of expectant fatherhood: A study of the fathers
of a group of premature infants. In S. Cath, A. Gurwitt, J. M. Ross
(Eds.) Father and Child: Developmental and Clinical Perspectives. (pp.
301-314). Boston: Little Brown.
Lamb,
M. E. (1986). The changing role of fathers. In M. E. Lamb (Ed.), The
Father's Role: Applied Perspectives. (pp. 3-27). New York: Wiley.
Lerner,
R. M., & Kreppner, K. (1989). Family systems and life-span development:
Issues and perspectives. In R. M. Lerner & K. Kreppner (Eds.), Family
systems and life-span development (pp. 1-14). Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence
Erlbaum.
Marcel,
G. (1964). Creative Fidelity. (pp. 147-174) New York: The Crossroad
Publishing Company.
Marsiglio,
W. (1993). Contemporary scholarship on fatherhood: Culture, identity,
and conduct. In W. Marsiglio (Ed.), Fatherhood: Contemporary theory,
research, and social policy (pp. 1-20). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.
Maslow,
A. H. (1954). Motivation and personality. New York: Harper Row.
Maslow,
A. H. (1968). Toward a psychology of being. (2nd Ed.). New York: D.
Van Nostrand.
Palm
G. F., & Palkovitz, R. (1988). The challenge of working with new
fathers: Implications for support providers. Marriage and Family Review,
12(3-4) 357-376.
Father
Involvement: A Contested Concept
Joseph
H. Pleck
University
of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign
The
research reported here was supported by grants to Joseph Pleck from
the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development and from
the Illinois Agricultural Experiment Station
Prior
to the 1980's, the social sciences had formulated many constructs regarding
fathers' behavior and relationship with their children (e.g., father
absence, warmth, responsiveness). No concept existed, however, addressing
how much fathers do as parents. To fill this gap, Lamb, Pleck, Charnov,
and Levine (1985, 1987; Pleck et al., 1985) proposed the construct of
"paternal involvement," a concept subsequently widely used.
Lamb and Pleck further conceptualized involvement as including three
components: (1) paternal interaction (engagement) with the child (in
the form of caretaking, or play or leisure), (2) availability (accessibility)
to the child, and (3) responsibility for the care of the child, as distinct
from the performance of care.
In recent years, paternal involvement has become a "contested terrain"
in the social sciences and in the broader culture. Several scholars
(including Lamb himself) now criticize the involvement construct as
defining the content of father involvement too narrowly. The concept
is defined narrowly, say the critics, because it is rooted in a "deficit
perspective" on fatherhood deriving from feminism, and because
it based on the experience of white, middle-class fathers (Christiansen
& Palkovitz, 2001; Hawkins & Palkovitz, 1999; Lamb, 2000; Marsiglio,
Amato, Day, & Lamb, 2000; Palkovitz, 1997. How valid are these criticisms?
Is
Paternal Involvement Defined Too Narrowly?
Palkovitz
(1997, p. 201) argues that involvement is "narrowly defined and
operationalized," including only "direct child care and related
housework" or "hands-on child care and housework." Lamb
(2000, p. 25) observes that involvement reflected "a restricted
focus on paternal nurturance and day-to-day child care." In particular,
the involvement construct does not include fathers' bread-winning. Before
considering this important exclusion, let's first review what paternal
activities besides bread-winning are actually excluded.
First,
the engagement component includes not just fathers' "care"
or "nurturant" activities, but all time fathers spent with
their children, with play specifically included. This is why the engagement
component was initially labeled with the broad term "interaction,"
rather than with a narrower term such as "care." In fact,
as illustrated by a New York Times op-ed article, "Superdad Needs
a Reality Check" (Rubenstein, 1998), some feminists criticized
the concept of involvement precisely because it includes non-caregiving
activities like play. Palkovitz (1997) proposes a broader formulation
of involvement that includes, besides caregiving, phenomena such as
communication, teaching, shared interests, shared activities, affection,
and emotional support. Since these activities generally occur in father-child
interaction, they are actually already included in paternal involvement
Second, via its accessibility and responsibility components, the involvement
construct also included activities not entailing direct interaction
with the child. Palkovitz's alternative formulation of involvement includes
such other behaviors as monitoring, planning, protecting, errands, and
child-related maintenance. Because of involvement's responsibility dimension,
however, these activities are actually already part of involvement.
What
about the exclusion of bread-winning? As researchers commonly do when
proposing a new construct, Lamb et al. (1985) explicitly defined their
focus. They noted that although "fathering surely includes a diverse
array of activities involved in conceiving, feeding, provisioning, protecting,
and rearing one's offspring," the involvement construct was intended
to describe something more limited. Lamb et al. argued that it was appropriate
to develop the narrower concept of involvement and its components "because
they
are undergoing particular change today" as well as because "psychologists
have yet to consider paternal behavior in a more comprehensive fashion"
(Lamb et al., 1985, p. 884).
Lamb
and Pleck thus agree with the critics that fathering includes bread-winning.
At issue is whether the concept of father involvement should include
it. Christiansen and Palkovitz (2001) make the most explicit case for
its inclusion. They argue, first, that economic providing is generally
a prerequisite for involvement. Further, most fathers view bread-winning
as a central aspect of fathering. Bread-winning in fact contributes
to child development (Amato, 1998). Also, the meaning of involvement
is incomplete unless providing is taken into account, e.g., if "attendance
at a child's dance performance is measured at the exclusion of the sacrifice
made in paying for dance lessons, the meaning of attending the dance
performance is diminished" (Christiansen & Palkovitz, 2001,
p.102). These arguments certainly underline the importance of taking
bread-winning into account when interpreting level of involvement. However,
they do not necessarily indicate that bread-winning should be considered
as a form of involvement.
Is
Paternal Involvement a "Deficit" Construct?
According
to the critics, the construct of involvement is rooted in feminist-derived
"fairness" or "gender equity" assumptions concerning
the marital division of labor (Hawkins et al., 1993; Hawkins & Dollahite,
1997). These assumptions imply a "deficit perspective" about
fathers (Palkovitz, 1997). As a result, involvement is implicitly defined
as the way that mothers are involved with children, or assumes a "mother
template" for understanding parenting. This is why the content
of paternal involvement is defined so narrowly. The grounding of the
involvement construct in the deficit perspective on fathering becomes
clear if one considers how involvement might have been conceptualized
differently had it been rooted in alternative context such as "generativity"
theory (Hawkins et al., 1993).
Some
evidence supports this criticism. In the initial presentations of the
concept (Lamb et al., 1985, 1987) as well as more recent reviews (Pleck,
1997), data on paternal involvement is summarized by characterizing
fathers' levels as a proportion of mothers', implying that mothers'
levels of involvement should be a baseline. The concept's specification
of a responsibility component clearly has equity overtones. Prior publications
by Pleck (1977, 1979, 1983, 1985) suggest that one of the construct's
principal authors indeed brought a feminist orientation to its development.
However,
several points about the involvement construct are not consistent with
the deficit interpretation. First, engagement would not have been defined
to include fathers' play with children if involvement reflected only
feminist concerns. As already noted, some feminists objected to the
construct for this reason. Second, if the deficit perspective were the
dominant influence underlying the construct's development and later
acceptance, the responsibility component would have been developed further
more than it has, since this is the involvement component in which fathers
are least involved relative to mothers (Pleck, 1997). Third, perusal
of recent research employing the involvement concept suggests that its
use does not necessarily lead scholars to view fathering in equity terms
(as examples, see Amato & Rivera, 1999; Bonney, Kelley, & Levant,
1999; Marsiglio (1991), NICHD Early Child Care Research Network, 2000).
In
addition, the way in which the involvement construct actually served
to counter the deficit perspective on fathers needs to be recognized.
Prior to Lamb et al. (1985, 1987), the most frequently cited statistic
about fathers' average time with children was 37 seconds per day, from
Rebelsky and Hanks' (1971) analysis of verbal interaction recorded by
a voice-activated microphone placed near an infant in 10 families (an
average that was actually arithmetically impossible in light of the
highest value reported). Lamb et al.'s (1985, 1987) findings that, averaging
across studies, fathers' engagement time was one-third of mothers',
and fathers' accessibility time was one-half, suggested that father
involvement was actually considerably greater than had been previously
thought.
Finally,
concern about whether fathers are doing enough to reduce the burden
on employed mothers was not the only reason for rapid acceptance of
the involvement construct. Beginning in the 1990s, this concern began
to be overshadowed by a more general apprehension about whether parents
of both genders combined were spending enough time with their children.
The concept of involvement, originally developed for fathers, seemed
to give the public a term for what they thought parents were not giving
enough of to their children. (The concern that parents spends less time
with their children today than in the past is actually unfounded; see
Chira, 1998, pp. 103-106; Pleck & Stueve, in press; Robinson &
Godbey, 1997, pp. 104-106).
Is
the Involvement Construct Grounded in White, Middle-Class Fathers' Experience?
Critics
say that that the involvement construct has an inherent white, middle-class
bias. The construct assumes that fatherhood has same meaning among all
cultural groups (Palkovitz, 1997). Involvement "ignored sub-cultural
variation in the definition and understanding of fatherhood," overlooking
aspects of fatherhood that are more important in racial-ethnic minority
fathers and non-middle-class fathers (Lamb, 2000, pp. 23-24).
On
reflection, this criticism seems misplaced. The criticism of white middle
class bias certainly applies to the concepts describing paternal behavior
that social sciences developed prior to involvement. Constructs such
as paternal warmth and responsiveness were first advanced in studies
of samples almost entirely white and middle class, and rarely if ever
investigated in other father groups. Prior to involvement, the social
sciences generated only one construct about fatherhood using diverse
samples, "father absence"--a concept regrettably much abused
when applied to racial-ethnic minority families.
By
contrast, the primary data for Lamb and Pleck's initial formulation
of paternal involvement came from time diary and other time use studies
with large representative national samples. These samples made it possible
to characterize levels of involvement for diverse groups. Although the
results of these comparisons were not emphasized in Lamb et al. (1985,
1987), they are stressed elsewhere (Pleck, 1983, 1985, 1997). In addition,
the emergence of the involvement construct stimulated a large body of
new research on fathers in diverse groups explicitly using a non-deficit
perspective (Pleck, 1997), research that the social sciences' prior
paternal constructs apparently could not.
Finally,
the criticism that the involvement concept ignores sub-cultural differences
in the understanding of fatherhood seems to assume that when the construct
is applied to fathers who are not white and middle class, research gives
the misleading impression that non-white, non middle class fathers are
less involved with their children. Actually, in the available comparisons,
majority and racial-ethnic minority fathers in father-present families
either show no differences in average level of involvement compared
to majority fathers, or the differences found favor minority fathers.
The same pattern holds true for comparisons by educational level, income,
and occupational prestige (Pleck, 1997).
Conclusions
Like
any new construct, father involvement needs continued refinement and
exploration. However, some recent criticisms of the concept are unfounded.
Though excluding bread-winning, the content of paternal involvement
is not as narrow in other respects as its critics indicate. The involvement
construct is also not so closely linked to a deficit perspective on
fatherhood, nor to the experience of white, middle class fathers as
the critiques suggest.
References
Amato,
P. R. (1998). More than money?: Men's contribution to their children's
lives. In A. Booth & A.C. Crouter (Eds.), Men in families: When
do they get involved? What difference does it make? (pp. 241-278). Mahwah,
NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.
Amato,
P.R., & Rivera, F. (1999). Paternal involvement and children's behavior.
Journal of Marriage and the Family, 61, 375-384.
Bonney,
J. F., Kelley, M. L., & Levant, R. F. (1999). A model of fathers'
behavioral involvement in child care in dual-earner families. Journal
of Family Psychology, 13, 401-415.
Chira,
S. (1998). A mother's place: Taking the debate about working mothers
beyond guilt and blame. New York: Harper Collins.
Christiansen,
S. L., & Palkovitz, R. (2001). Why the "good provider"
role still matters: Providing as a form of paternal involvement. Journal
of Family Issues, 22, 84-106.
Hawkins,
A. J., Christiansen, S. L., Sargent, K. P. & Hill, E. J. (1993).
Rethinking fathers' involvement in child care: A developmental perspective.
Journal of Family Issues, 14, 531-549.
Hawkins,
A.J. & Dollahite, D.C. (1997). Beyond the role-inadequacy perspective
of fathering. In A.J. Hawkins & D.C. Dollahite (Eds.), Generative
fathering: Beyond deficit perspectives (pp. 3-16). Thousand Oaks, CA:
Sage Publications.
Hawkins,
A.J., & Palkovitz, R. (1999). Beyond ticks and clicks: The need
for more diverse and broader conceptualizations and measures of father
involvement. Journal of Men's Studies, 8, 11-32.
Lamb,
M. E. (2000). The history of research on father involvement: An overview.
Marriage & Family Review, 29, 23-42.
Lamb,
M.E., Pleck, J.H., Charnov, E.L., & Levine, J.A. (1985). Paternal
behavior in humans. American Zoologist, 25, 883-894.
Lamb,
M. E., Pleck, J. H., Charnov, E. L. & Levine, J. A. (1987). A biosocial
perspective on paternal behavior and involvement. In Lancaster, J. B.,
Altmann, J., A. S. Rossi, & Sherrod, L. R. (Eds.), Parenting across
the lifespan: Biosocial dimensions (pp. 111-142). Hawthorne, NY: Aldine.
Marsiglio,
W. (1991). Paternal engagement activities with minor children. Journal
of Marriage and the Family, 53, 973-986.
Marsiglio,
W., Amato, P., Day, R, & Lamb, M.E. (2000). Scholarship on fatherhood
in the 1990s and beyond. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 62, 1173-1191.
NICHD Early Child Care Research Network (2000). Factors associated with
fathers' caregiving activities and sensitivity with young children.
Journal of Family Psychology, 14, 200-219.
Palkovitz,
R. (1997). Reconstructing "involvement": Expanding conceptualizations
of men's caring in contemporary families. In A.J. Hawkins & D.C.
Dollahite (Eds.), Generative fathering: Beyond deficit perspectives
(pp. 200-216). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.
Pleck,
J.H. (1977). The work-family role system. Social Problems, 24, 417-427.
Pleck, J.H. (1979). Men's family work: Three perspectives and some new
data. Family Coordinator, 29(4), 481-488.
Pleck,
J.H. (1983). Husbands' paid work and family roles: Current research
issues. In H. Lopata, & J. Pleck (Eds.), Research in the interweave
of social roles: Vol. 3. Families and jobs (pp. 231-333). Greenwich,
CT: JAI Press.
Pleck,
J.H. (1985). Working wives, working husbands. Beverly Hills, CA: Sage.
Pleck,
J.H. (1997). Paternal involvement: Levels, sources, and consequences.
In M.E. Lamb (Ed.), The role of the father in child development (3rd
ed., pp 123-167). New York: Wiley and Sons.
Pleck,
J.H., Lamb, M.E., & Levine, J.A. (1985). Epilog: Facilitating future
change in men's family roles. In R.A. Lewis, & M. Sussman (Eds.),
Men's changing roles in the family (pp. 11-16). New York: Haworth Press.
Pleck,
J.H., & Stueve, J.L. (in press). Time and paternal involvement.
In K. Daly (Ed.), Minding the time in family experience: Emerging perspectives
and issues. Oxford, UK: Elsevier Science.
Rebelsky,
F., & Hanks, C. (1971). Fathers' verbal interaction with infants
in the first three months of life. Child Development, 42, 63-68.
Robinson,
J. P., & Godbey, G. (1997). Time for life: Surprising ways Americans
use their time. University Park, PN: The Pennsylvania State University
Press.
Rubenstein,
C. (1998, April 16) Superdad needs a reality check. The New York Times,
p. A17.
What
Does a Son Need From His Dad?
Neil
Chethik
Author
of Father Loss
Lexington,
Kentucky
What
does a son need from his dad? As the father of a 7-year-old boy, I've
long desired an answer to this question. I know how my father raised
me, and I've watched a lot of other men commit fatherhood. But the essence
of fathering has always eluded me.
Researching
my new book, "FatherLoss," I saw a chance to examine the issue
of good fathering. While my book focused on how sons deal with the deaths
of their fathers, I took the opportunity to ask about the father's life
as well. To the 70 men I interviewed in-depth, I asked: What did your
father do that gave you strength? What did he do that made you feel
valued? What was best about you father's way of fathering? In this article,
I'll share three elements of "good fathering," as described
by the men I interviewed. (Demographics of the sample are available
at www.FatherLoss.com.)
The
first element of good fathering, according to sons, was AFFECTION,
particularly physical affection. For many of the sons I spoke with,
their fondest memories of childhood were wrestling with their dads,
being tossed into the air or carried piggy-back, or some other form
of direct physical play. "When my dad would come home from work,
I would jump into his arms," one middle-aged man told me. "I'd
give him a kiss.... He welcomed it." Another man reported that
"after my father came home from work and cleaned up, he'd set me
on his lap and sing to me. I was four or five at the time." Why
was physical affection so fondly remembered by sons? For one thing,
it offered the boy a close-up view of the beast he would one day become:
a man. The boy experienced, in his body and bones, how a man moves,
feels, and smells. Just as importantly, when the father's touch was
playful and loving, the son felt accepted and protected.
Of
course, some fathers did not easily go to physical affection. Perhaps
they were raised without such contact with their own fathers, and found
it alien, even unmanly. Fortunately, I discovered that affection could
be administered in a variety of ways.
Some
showed it by simply talking with, and listening to, their sons. Others
offered affection by intellectually engaging with their children playing
board games, doing crossword puzzles together, and the like. Still others
showed affection by taking an active interest in a son's schoolwork
or other endeavors. Ultimately, affection was less about physicality
than about loving attention by a father toward his son.
It was possible for a father to overdo this kind of attention, to become
controlling or heavy-handed. One son said: "If he'd had his way,
I'd have been a marionette." These dads tended to have an agenda;
they wanted their sons to participate in certain activities, even if
the sons were not interested. Rather than feeling strengthened by this
kind of attention, sons told me they felt diminished. Their fathers
were unable to affirm the son for who he really was, and tried instead
to make the son into their own image. The result, most often, was low
self-confidence on the part of the son, and a strained relationship
between him and his dad.
The second element of good fathering was BLESSING. While affection seemed
most beneficial in a son's childhood (though it was appreciated throughout
life), blessings seemed most valuable to adolescent and young-adult
sons. In the introduction to my book, I write of the importance of receiving
my own father's blessing, the direct expression of his respect for me,
when I was 27. He'd said at the time: "I want to tell you now how
proud I am of you, of the choices you've made, of the life you've created."
My
father's blessing was especially important to me because I was concerned
that I'd disappointed him. He'd put me through college, and now, five
years into my career, I'd quit a good job with no plan for what I'd
do next. When my father told me he was proud of the choices I'd made,
I took it to mean that he supported me in my decision to stop and re-evaluate
my career direction. I began to trust myself to make the right next
steps.
One
man I interviewed, a business executive, said he received a traditional
Mexican blessing - a bendicion - from his father when the son left Texas
at age 19 to look for work in California. The blessing, uttered by his
father in Spanish, affirmed that the son was ready for the journey ahead,
and called upon God and humanity to look after him. It also softened
the son's feelings toward a father who had often been harsh and uncompromising.
While this father, and my own, expressed blessings in straight-forward
ways, other sons told me of more subtle blessings. One said his father
blessed him by asking for his advice about family and financial matters.
Another said he felt blessed, when he was invited to accompany his father
to American Legion gatherings. "It was almost a rite of passage,"
the son recalled. "His taking me (to the Legion club) and buying
me a beer made me feel accepted as an equal. I came into my own in his
circle of friends." Why were blessings so important? For one thing,
they tended to salve wounds the son had received from the father in
childhood. And they often served as a hand up as well. Sons who received
the blessings of their fathers frequently spoke afterwards of feeling
more mature, more fully adult. It was as if the father was representing
not only himself, but the adult male world, and the son had been accepted
into it.
The
third element of good fathering was one I had not considered before
my
interviews: CLOSURE. This generally occurred toward the end of the father's
life, usually when the son was an adult himself. In addition to interviewing
70 men for my book, I commissioned a university to conduct a survey
of 300 men whose fathers had died. Among a host of interesting data
was this: Only about 40 percent of men said good-bye to their father
before he died. But more than 80 percent of that group said the good-bye
helped them in coping with the death of the father. The message I take
from this is that even in our last weeks, days, and hours as fathers,
we can still help our children navigate the difficult moments in their
lives. We can still give them what they need. Like affection and blessing,
closure can be accomplished in a variety of forms. Some fathers simply
said, "Good-bye." Others told their sons how proud they were
to have been their father. Still others left behind letters, special
mementoes, carefully worded wills - anything that would signal to the
son that the father was satisfied with how the son turned out. The value
of closure was enormous. After the father's death, sons who felt
complete with their dads were usually sad, even temporarily devastated
by the loss. But gradually, usually over a few months, their sadness
was replaced by warmer memories. On the other hand, sons who did not
get closure were, even decades after the father's death, haunted by
guilt, resentments, or regrets.
There
are certainly other elements of good fathering, but these three serve
were mentioned most often. They remind me of what my own son needs now,
and what he is likely to need down the road.
Reference
Chethik,
Neil. (2001). FatherLoss: How sons of all ages come to terms with
the deaths of their dads. New York: Hyperion.
Eulogy
for my Father
Ronald
F. Levant
Center
for Psychological Studies
Nova
Southeastern University
I
stand before you today to pay my last respects, and to say my final
goodbyes, to my father Harry G. Levant.
I
have to admit at the outset that it is very difficult to do this. The
difficulty is not just due to the obvious causes -- the sadness, the
grief, and the sense of loss. Nor is it due to the confrontation with
death in its utter finality, and the resulting fear regarding one's
own mortality.
No,
this is difficult for me primarily because of all of the unfinished
business that I have with my father. And while a part of me continues
to nurture the hope that, had he lived longer, I would have been able
to finish my business, I have to acknowledge that this is not true.
Because,
the fact is, it is very hard for sons to ever attain a really clear
perspective on their own fathers.
I
know this to be true from my 20 years of experience as a psychologist
whose central interest has been fatherhood.
In
the Fatherhood Course that I teach, this issue of son-father business
usually comes up in the first class. We might be talking about why the
men decided to enroll in the course, and after a few guys give the standard
reasons, and others make some quips, the mood palpably shifts to serious
as one father speaks, lower lip quivering: "You want to know why
I am here? I'll tell you why I am here. I am here so that my little
son Timmy will not feel as bad about me when he's grown up as I do about
my own dad." The man's words hit the room like a hurricane, and
soon the theme of father son business is on every man's lips. The fathers
then become sons and talk about the grief, pain and bitterness they
feel toward their own fathers.
Let's
go into the classroom now, so that you can hear these men's voices:
"I
never know what my father thought. He just would never talk about himself."
"I
know he loved us because he was a good provider. He worked two jobs
in order to put all five of us though parochial school and several of
us though college. But I never knew if he liked me."
"To
this day I wonder what he really thinks of me. Is he proud of me?"
"Every
time I call home, Dad answers the phone, and it usually goes like this:
`Hi. How are you? How's Liz? How are the kids? Everything ok at work?
Here's mom.'"
"When
my father was dying I took care of him. I did some pretty intimate things,
like shave him. One night I bent over to kiss him on the forehead and
he put up his feeble, shaky arm to push me away: `No son, men don't
do that,' he said."
I
also know how hard sons struggle with their relationships with their
fathers from my own life, of course. As a son I have tried over a long
period of time to transcend the intergenerational hierarchical boundary
that defines the father as a father and the son as a son, in order to
meet my father on a plane where we are both adults.
I
worked for many years to reduce my own emotional reactivity to my father.
I discovered a way to measure my progress: I would see how long it would
take after I crossed the threshold into the family home for me to regress
to the surly adolescent I once was. I worked on this for years and made
modest progress.
During
this time I learned that progress in this kind of work can be facilitated
by a ritual event, the kind that signifies the maturity of the son.
Well, I wondered what sort of event that would have to be for me, because
it certainly didn't happen at my Bar Mitzvah (the Jewish boy's rite
of passage), nor did it happen when I left home to go to college, nor
when I married, nor when I became a father myself, nor when I earned
my doctoral degree!
I
had just about given up on ritual events until the wedding of my daughter
Caren almost 10 years ago. That did it. My father and I seemed to relate
a bit more easily from that point onward. And, as a dramatic punctuation
to this transformation, my brother Lowell got into an argument with
my father during the rehearsal dinner, an argument very similar to those
that I used to find myself in.
Why
is the son-father relationship so difficult? Being a son I can't quite
shake the feeling that I am not really qualified to say, but I think
it starts out with a series of miscommunications:
*
Sons, banished from the comfort of a close relationship with their mothers
at an uncomfortably early age lest they develop into sissies or mama's
boys, look to their dads for some of that lost nurturance.
*
Fathers feel a tremendous obligation to make their sons into men, in
the classical/traditional sense of stoic, aggressive, self-reliant,
stay-calm-in-the-face-of-danger manhood. As a result they feel that
it is their job to wean their sons of their neediness, and to put a
hard shell around their child's vulnerable emotions (such as fear, sadness,
hurt and loneliness).
*
Males as a rule are not particularly good at sensing other people's
emotions nor in expressing their own, so the miscues that begin in early
childhood get compounded over the years. Only rarely do they get resolved.
So
where am I in all of this? Obviously I find it easier to talk about
other people and things in general than to talk about myself as a son
in relationship to my own father. And of course this reflects the fact
that I do have unfinished business with him.
And
just what is this business?
*
First of all there is a deep yearning for a close relationship with
him. I loved him and wanted to know that he loved me. It took years
of work to get beyond the anger so that I could admit that to myself.
*
Then there are a lot of son questions:
-
What was it like for him to be my dad, especially during the early years
when he was stationed in the Pacific during WWII and saw me only rarely?
What did he think about during those long absences?
-
What did he feel when he learned that, as a two year old living with
my mother and maternal grandparents, I would open the shirt of any man
who came to the house to check and see if he had enough chest hair to
be dad?
-
What was his reaction when at the age of four I packed my pockets with
snow upon leaving Minnesota to reunite with him in California because
I thought he would really like snow.
-
Why was he always so tense and unhappy in that house on Ledgewood Road?
-
Why was he so disapproving and angry at me?
Earlier
this morning as I viewed my father's body at the mortuary, I pondered
what I was going to do with all of this unfinished business, and I came
to the following conclusions:
*
He was a good provider and a responsible contributing member of the
community. From working long hours as a printer, to owning his own printing
shop, to working for others as an estimator, to his non-retired retirement
of working for SCORE and being actively involved in the American Legion
and the VFW, he gave it his all.
*
Despite the outward argumentativeness, he and my mother Wilma were as
close as two people can ever be, and I feel blessed that I was able
to celebrate their Golden Anniversary two years ago.
*
He had some spectacular talents. He could perform a long series of arithmetical
operations with six and seven digit numbers entirely in his head.
*
He had some severe limitations, some resulting from his own childhood,
others from WWII. It is sad that he was so self-sufficient that he could
never avail himself of help.
*
He fully lived up to his standards, which were the standards of his
generation, a generation unlike my own whose world view was shaped by
the severe hardship of the Great Depression and the near calamity of
WWII.
*
He did the best he could with what he had.
GOODBYE
DAD
I LOVE YOU
I'LL MISS YOU
Harry
G. Levant
10/12/13 -10/16/94
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in what other cookbook will you find Lenore Walker's Holiday Turkey,
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green pepper recipe, or David Rose's Teppanyaki Pancake recipe (yum).
All the recipes in the book are clearly 'family favorites' that are
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is a cookbook that everyone must own!" The Division's Cookbook is
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Psychological Services, 5380 Holiday Terrace, Kalamazoo, MI 49009.
Make your check payable to "Larry Beer."

Society
for the Psychological Student of Men and Masculinity
Division
51 of the American Psychological
GOVERNANCE
PRESIDENT
James
Dean, PhD
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University Counseling Service
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Lawrence
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(2000-2001)
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Student Development
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Psychology
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